MOMOTARO

2012-03-06T20:35:00.001+08:00

Sometimes I feel like leaving. It would hurt me the most but at least

everyone else will be much more happier then.

#justsaying

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2012-03-05T05:54:00.001+08:00

Walaupun pahit, akan ku telan juga :')

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2012-03-04T15:11:00.001+08:00

Another thing.

Back then, when it comes to this.

I wont get affected easily. Ill be optimistic and be cool about things.

But now its different. Couldnt be that Ive changed, that ive become weak, that ill shake easily. Or is it this time, its for real. What I have right now is the real thing. It definitely is much more stronger. I can feel it.

The saying mens' greatest weakness is a.....

And its true. They can change men just like that.

Never mind, ill take it that

Ive turned soft ......

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2012-03-04T15:02:00.001+08:00

Hey, bored. Nvr mind ill just blog waiting. Waiting for what ? I dont even know what im waiting for. Hmmm..

I need to get some of my old self back. The expressionless me. I used to be able to surpress my feelings, my emotions, my facial expressions.

Just like a stealthy ninja assassin.

People wont know what im thinking. People wont know what im feeling. And people definitely wont be worried cause I will be like "im ok" .

Better that way. Wont hurt others.

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2012-03-04T14:55:00.001+08:00

Meaning of Renggang ?

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2012-03-03T12:06:00.001+08:00

CUTE NYA !!

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2012-03-03T10:49:00.001+08:00

My little princess <3

Im missing you :')

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2012-03-03T10:48:00.001+08:00

GERAMs !!

Feel like pinching her cheeks !!

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2012-03-03T10:22:00.001+08:00

I know what I feel is true.

I LOVE YOU <3 :')

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2012-03-01T09:48:00.001+08:00

When it comes to you, everything is real

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2012-03-01T09:44:00.001+08:00

Its good knowing that I could cry :')

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2012-03-01T09:27:00.001+08:00

I dont feel like I should txt you.

Cause im ashamed. I truly am ashamed of myself :'(

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2012-03-01T09:19:00.001+08:00

Ok. I know its my fault for not replying you text. I did it again. Feel like crying. I swear im not making this up, its the truth. Sumpah. Kalau tipu kene dot dot dot... I really intend to send you a morning msg before you wake up but I was too late. Urghh.. In really sorry..

I dont blame you if wont believe me cause truly, im the one at fault...

Im sorry, I didnt make you smile :(

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2012-03-01T09:11:00.001+08:00

Seriously, im confused right now. When things are like this, Ill always say its my fault. I dont want to blame anyone, or they blaming themselves.

I dont like this feeling. Bad vibes every where. *sobs. I feel like crying. Urgh !! Dont feel like doin anything :/

I can feel when sonething isnt right ~

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2012-02-26T17:03:00.001+08:00

http://answers.yahoo.com/question/index?qid=20110216114916AA9jaci

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2012-02-26T00:32:00.001+08:00

Hmmm, things running through the back of my mind. I hate this feeling. Dont like wat i see and my curiousity just had to look :/

Never mind. Your well being is much more important..

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2012-02-24T02:41:00.003+08:00

My hear still beats fast and im still smiling ~

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2012-02-24T02:41:00.001+08:00

I didnt think that things will turn out this way.

I refused to give in to my heart. I told myself that it was only infatuation taking over. There is jealousy but its normal.

I knew things but i kept quiet. Surely, a one sided fairytale. But as time passes by, things changed.

I could see all attention was on me.

I dont mind cause it fills up my emptiness. Gone through ups and downs together and when i disappeared one day, everything was a mess for both of us.

Almost gave up on me. And thats when i realized. Sacrifices. Sacrifices made. Made just for me.

My heart opened up, debating with my brain. Losing someone precious, it hurts, its torturous, it kills. When the source of life aches, the mind wont function. Life turned dull. Smiles are heavy. The body just wont respond, lay aimlessly on the ground.

Anger, sadness, dissapointment. Signs of a broken heart....

Hey, hello everyone. Its 1:33 am and im here blogging. Have you read the composition above? *Laughs

Im not gonna give out composition questions for you guys to answer so dont worry.

Its been like four days straight having someone by my side. The attention given, all the pampering. The love. But i still cant stop thinking about you. How can i not? Before i sleep, i think of you. The moment i wake up, you popped out. Why? Cause its you on my wallpaper, NOT !! Its because my heart yearns for you..

Having you in my life mean the whole world to me. I cant describe whats written in my heart. This feeling, its wonderful. My heart race thinking about it. Youre just precious, youre priceless.

I just cant stop smiling :D

Dont ever ignore someone who cares. Dont ever ignore someone who accepts your imperfecrions. Dont ever ignore someone who would do anything for you. Dont ever ignore someone who would sacrifice their time for you. Dont ever, ever ignore someone who truly and sincerely love you cause they are the ones who would be there for you, till the end.

<3 And i know i found one....

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2012-02-22T13:39:00.001+08:00

Had a dream few days ago. Me and my brother hang out and talked. It felt so real :')

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2012-02-21T09:07:00.001+08:00

I should set some restrictions ~

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2012-02-20T03:47:00.001+08:00

Wait for me

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2012-02-20T03:46:00.001+08:00

Wait for me

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2012-02-19T22:34:00.001+08:00

When you love someone,

You should let them go.

Maybe its time I made my move to leave for good....

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2012-02-19T21:05:00.001+08:00

Kept wondering watcha doin ? But I guess youre having fun.. Enjoy your day ^^

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2012-02-19T19:13:00.001+08:00

At first I wasnt sure wat it was. Surely, it could come in any form. It was just merely a thought. Things did happen. Now I know for sure but, the problem is just me....

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2012-02-19T08:35:00.003+08:00

I just wanna sleep it off...

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2012-02-19T08:35:00.001+08:00

I cant tell someone what to do. I have no right...

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2012-02-19T08:33:00.001+08:00

This always popped up, " nak kene ikot ke ? "

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2012-02-19T08:31:00.001+08:00

A friend wanted to come over

At night cause he was bored.

I declined, told him I wanna sleep early but in fact I was on the phone.

Then I was put on hold and listened to someone elses long convo. " musr you pick it up ? ", thats what I said to myself. I felt like hanging up. I do. But I wait patiently. Waited but had to hang up cause I understand why but *sigh

Convo didnt end properly. Never mind..

Its not your fault, things happen.

Things happen for a reason. I dont blame you and how much I feel to blame ' someone else ', I just have to blame myself.

Its easy to ignore these feelings but

this time, its different.

Urgh..

I should sleep soon...

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2012-02-19T08:11:00.001+08:00

Sorry. Its disturbing inside..

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2012-02-19T07:57:00.001+08:00

Hmmm,

Do you guys believe in karma ?

Im not sure but it seems like karma is hitting me. Bleargh ..

Kinda sleepy but never mind.

Wheres Mr.Sandman ?

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2012-02-19T07:51:00.001+08:00

Tweeter.

Facebook.

Photo.

Text.

Call.

Technology ~

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2012-02-18T22:13:00.001+08:00

I didnt persue, I held back, cause smthing told me to stay..

Theres no right or wrong answer

But there is, the best solution.

I get what you said. Even before, ive already gotten it. Im just unsure but from the lessons learnt in our journey, the last one hit me. It hit me hard. I knew, it has always been right infront of me yet I kinda turn the other way, shut my eyes, covered my ears, hid my heart far away cause I myself know, my position.

Maybe I know what youre thinking,

Maybe I know what youre hoping for and maybe I know what you want. If im not wrong, Ive got it.

It simply mean I should start making a move. Like what my mama always said, we should move foward, not back. I know words are just words, Actions do speak louder. I shouldnt try but I should do it instead.

Everyone wants an easy life but to really achieve it, its all about hard work and effort. Living in this era, everything involves money. Money money money. Life is like this, life is unfair, life aint perfect cause humanity is cruel. Wealth gives power, power creates greed, greed consumes sanity..

The government is ridiculous.

Yeap, dont know where im going in this blog. I lost track. This is what happens when I think a lot. Topics changed in a chain reaction. Back to track...

Dont waste time ~

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2012-02-18T04:21:00.001+08:00

Cemburu tandanya ?

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2012-02-18T03:59:00.001+08:00

Zero mood.

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2012-02-17T15:49:00.001+08:00

Ouh my body aches so much since the past two days :/

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2012-02-11T13:30:00.001+08:00

Seriously, I feel sooo stupid right now. Like what I tweeted in twitter, someone please do punch me in the face. Urgh !!

Im sorry, I misunderstood.

I really wanted to talk to you, like how we used to. I quickly charge my phone so it wont die out. But when I received yr text, I froze, wondering why. What did I do wrong which offended you ?

Seriously, I took your joke for real And it shows wat a dumb klutz I am.

BODOH KAN.

Please, punch me in the face ><

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2012-02-11T08:26:00.001+08:00

Maybe thats how he felt, maybe thats why...

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2012-02-11T08:25:00.001+08:00

For wat I felt, maybe its not as terrible like wat u felt but never mind. Im patient. I dont know if youre joking about it or purposely being sarcastic with me. I dont wanna say much. Ill take it. Ill take as much as I can. Ill take it till who knows whatever shit will happen.

I know im not a good person, probably, I shouldnt be treated nice. If thats fair, so be it.

Im trying my best to avoid every possible conflicts, being patient, swallowing my ego up. Talking nicely. Only he knows. But hmmm,

I know myself best.

What ever it is, im standing ground...

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2012-02-11T02:16:00.001+08:00

I cant do anything. Only feel sorry for my pathetic myself ~

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2012-02-11T02:09:00.001+08:00

Why ?

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2012-02-11T02:06:00.001+08:00

God, what did I do now ?

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2012-02-08T20:44:00.001+08:00

Every time I hurt you,

I'll get punishment from god.

I left you hanging, and now god

let me taste what it feels like to be hanging instead. Much more bitter than what ive experienced before.

Im not asking for sympathy. Just expressing it out here, like I always did to release everything but it doesnt work. Too bad for me. Like I said I deserve more harshness than this. Hais. Ill be fine, hopefully...

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2012-02-08T20:06:00.001+08:00

Only god knows how I feel ~

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2012-02-07T23:34:00.001+08:00

And yes, singtel did gave me problems yesterday night till morning :(

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2012-02-07T23:14:00.001+08:00

Hi again. Im sorry if ive made you worried. Im sorry if ive made you have doubts and alot of negativity. I dont mean to hurt you.

I dont know how to put it or how to say it. But i'll just tell the truth. Im happy having you in my life. I really am. I love the care and attention you've given me. I really appreciate it. I do. And the thought of you not being part of my life, it really hurt. It does hurt and my heart aches as if someone is clenching it tight.

I always did think of you all the time.

When its 7am, I wonder if youre awake, getting ready for school. When its noon, i'd figure youre having lunch. And late in the evening, i'd imagine youre on your way home or already am home. At night, I assumed youre asleep or watching tv. Im always wondering whats on your mind. What are you thinking about. Thoughts everywhere. Happy, sad, jealousy, just anything. I even had this thinking if im ever a bother in your life. Hmmmm.

Im sorry if I made feel that youre chasing me. Cause most of the time, youre the 1st one to text me. Its not that I dont bother. I just dont wanna worry you. And im afraid. I dont wanna worry you cause of my unhealthy lifestyle. I know i dont really take care of my body well, My sleeping disorder. At times I tried to sleep, but I cant. When I thought of staying up and make up for it by sleeping early at night. I overslept by alot. And why im afraid ? Ever since that day, I fear it will happen again. I wanna text you but I held back cause yes, im afraid. I know, we cant avoid conflicts but I dont like us quarreling. I dont like it at all cause id be helpless. I go weak when it comes to you. Even if I were to be furious, id go soft against you. Im not saying its your fault, its nobody's fault. Its cause you are my everything <3

Once again I apologize. In sorry for always making you worried and I know ive hurt you alot. Im not perfect and ill try to be a better person. How much I want someone in my life, I know I cant force them to stay. Just saying. I just want you to know, ill never leave you ~

To my precious lil sis :') <3

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2012-02-07T00:15:00.001+08:00

Hello. I miss this pretty girl soo very much. My lovely lil sis. Ouh when will we meet again. I soo wanna pinch your cheeks..

Ok bye2, hug many2 kay ;D

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2012-02-05T23:42:00.001+08:00

KEMAROKS

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2012-02-05T21:52:00.001+08:00

If that someone is reffering to me,

Remember who always give without taking back. Period ~

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2012-02-03T02:55:00.001+08:00

Maybe, the reason I go soft towards you is beacause I cared and want to see you smile :')

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2012-02-03T00:55:00.001+08:00

Im left to bleed. Wouldnt that make a great song title ? I dont know what yore doin. Maybe youre asleep. Maybe you cant be bothered bout me anymore. You make me confuse. I wanna state a question but in the end, that question would probably make it worst. Never mind. Im at a lose lose situation. Whatever I do, I will lose. When it comes to you, I will lose. My ego isnt strong. It pains me. I cant get mad, I cant be happy. Sorrow is the word. I blanked again. I kept wanting to say, to give out questions but ill always end up getting, "abeh nak ungkit". Thats what I get when I try to win an argument between my brother. And he is the one who always "ungkit". Maybe thats why I dont question others.

Dont leave me, please dont. But what ever ill say, youll end up saying I dont care about you, dont care about what youve done for me and that makes me down. You think I dont appreciate ? Ask the one above.

And yet again, Ive got things to say and I know, I will get a negative answer. I know. Its killling me. It is.

Im no sweet talker mother fucker,

Im not saying all this to calm you down, this is strictly from me.

I cant say more.

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2012-02-02T03:11:00.001+08:00

Im home, I guess ill turn in early.

I miss my 7 hrs of sleep yesterday.

Hope I come back to my senses ~

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2012-02-02T02:44:00.001+08:00

Now im feeling down. I dont wanna go home yet. The wind is cool. Maybe it will calm me down.

Wheres the moon ? I wanna talk to it. Wheres the stars, I wanna count the winks i'll get. Wheres the crickets, I want music to soothe my ears. Eventually, all I want is ....

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2012-02-02T01:02:00.001+08:00

I wont lie, I miss everything ~

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2012-02-01T19:30:00.001+08:00

I predict what youll reply next wont be to my liking ~

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2012-02-01T19:29:00.001+08:00

Dont tell me to find someone else cause all ive been thinking bout is you..

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2012-02-01T19:26:00.001+08:00

Let me cool down. Let me think straight..

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2012-02-01T19:24:00.001+08:00

Like I said, I get it already. Do my resume. Do my resume. Dont de-motivate me more..

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2012-02-01T19:23:00.001+08:00

And without realizing, you are so called threatening me. Saying that we should end 15092011. That really de-motivates me..

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2012-02-01T19:18:00.001+08:00

One of the reasons im pissed of is because you made use of your health. You dont need to that. I got it. Im a lil hard headed. I dont like to be ordered. I do things at own pace. Why im like this ? I dont even know. Maybe Ive changed somewhere, sometime throughout my life. I may seem carefree, forever happy having people around but who knows what im thinking. I dont put myself before others. Sometimes I think I dont really take care of my well being. Maybe thats why im like this..

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2012-02-01T18:55:00.001+08:00

I held back. I know even if I reply your text msgs, we will still end up having debates. I know you want the best from me, you cared for me, for my well being, for my future. I know you meant well but I just dont like the way you dealt with me...

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2012-02-01T18:50:00.001+08:00

My presence only brings pain. Joy dont last long but pain leave scars behind. My mind is still not straight. Mixed emotions. I dont want us to be strangers but everytime, I held back. Thats why I didnt reply your msgs...

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2012-02-01T09:15:00.001+08:00

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still restless ~

2012-02-01T02:46:00.001+08:00

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2012-01-31T22:42:00.001+08:00

If im the cause of bad things,

I rather shunt myself from society ~

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2012-01-31T09:52:00.001+08:00

Urgh, I still cant calm down !!

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2012-01-31T09:35:00.001+08:00

You always had to distance us apart ~

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2012-01-31T09:33:00.001+08:00

All I did was to make you cry. All I did was to hurt you. Everything I did, doesnt make you happy, just to steal your smiles.

I must be one selfish bastard huh ?

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2012-01-31T09:22:00.001+08:00

Pissed at first, then friends add more fuel to the fire followed by mom. Yeah, wat a day. Serve me right. Haha I deserve this. Great.

Wats next ? Singtel is gonna give problems ? Handphone wont start.

Lost my keys. Cut my fingers. What ?

Pft !!

Urgh, calm down ? Can I ? Hope so. When? Tomorrow ? The day after? Miracle. I guess I cant sleep now with all the rage built up in me.

Urgh !! Cant get out, cant get out. Cant let it out. Fuck it !! How am I supposed to calm down ? How ?

Someone punch me to sleep please.

Please do a good one till I cant get up. Pft !!

I dont mind you nagging ay me or whatever but you just have to overdid it threatening me. To make it worst you dare put your health and even our "sibling relationship" on the line. You could you ? You had to gamble. You had to threaten me. What if I just fucked off ? Would you want that ? And your health isnt something you should use to threaten me. What if I threaten you instead ? Putting everything on the line. What if I threatened that ill slit my wrist, ill commit suicide. What if I threaten that I will never see you again? Would you like being threatened ??

Then in the future when I dont do something, even little things, youll threaten me again.

Gamble everything as if it doesnt mean a thing to you. I dont even dare using it as a threat.

Ya, when a guy lies, wow, the guy ia such a jerk. How could he lie. That liar. The nerve, this bastard. And when a girl lies, shes forgiven for what ever reason given. Sexist.

And you had to lie about your medication. Great. Youre coughing non stop and you do this. Just great.

When you already know someone is pissed and you knew why, dont go ask him why, what is he angry about. You know its the worst thing you should ever do. And the tone you gave me, its not talking nicely. Its talking overpoweringly.

You hate it when ppl hung up on you but you dared threaten me that youll hang up on me. Heh..

Whose fault is this ? Who is to be blamed ? The one who started it is at fault and would eventually be blamed for everything. Ya my fault.

Im to be blamed. Ill take the shits. Every thing that happened, what ever things you did, its my fault.

Its not wrong for you not to eat your medication cause im at fault. Because of me.

And Im still wide awake !! Still cant calm down. Nice. And I shall continue this way...

Pft !!

I need to be alone...

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2012-01-31T02:17:00.001+08:00

What if im all serious and no fun ?

O_o

Try ? Try ? Try ? Try ? Try ? Try ? Try ? Try ? Try ? Try ? Try ? Try ? Try ? Try ?

PFT !!

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2012-01-31T02:14:00.001+08:00

Where have my mood gone to ? *singing ouh where ouh where have

my usual mood gone ? Ouh where ouh where can it be ? Ouh where ouh where......

*sigh

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2012-01-30T23:58:00.001+08:00

I think I saw someone. If im not mistaken. Eyes could decieve. What ever it is, I hope your doin fine ^^

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2012-01-27T17:19:00.001+08:00

When you love someone,

It doesnt mean he/she have to be yours. Facts ~

Maybe I do feel the same towards you but I know I cant. I get the feeling that ill regret running away from all this. Thats why ill stay even

If it hurts me in the long run. Im not strong either but all I want is to make you happy. Your smiles, are my smiles too. Period~

Your actions tells me that you

are leaving me for good. You made me be in a stand still, thinking, should I text you? Cause my gut tells me all I get, is an argument. You made yourself be a barrier. Not a barrier to prevent me from my social life, but a barrier to prevent me from you.

Besides my own family,

You too are part of me. You are in my heart. Precious.

I want u to stay ...

Please stay.. please do stay..

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2012-01-27T02:21:00.001+08:00

We might walk a different path one day, but it doesnt mean im going away forever.

Fate ~

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2012-01-25T22:40:00.001+08:00

Dear little one.

Dont think negatively pretty please :/

Seriously, you are not a bother to me. Im happy having you in my life.

Youre the one whom I look foward to when I wake up. I know youre the one who always take the initiative to text me 1st everyday. I appreciate everything youve done for me, I appreciate you. Im not saying all these just to please you, its to let you know you really are someone I treasure in my heart. Youre family.

Im always yours to bother, yours to cling on to, yours to share anything with. I will always be yours.

I assure you ^^ <3

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2012-01-24T17:17:00.003+08:00

I hope so..

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2012-01-24T17:17:00.001+08:00

Ill just keep on blabering here till everything will die out Eventually ~

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2012-01-24T17:15:00.001+08:00

Bottled up inside. It burns. It still does. Scars wont heal ~

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2012-01-24T17:13:00.001+08:00

Somehow ~

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2012-01-24T17:12:00.001+08:00

I feel like mine have been tampered. Yes, I did feel it cause it happened.

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2012-01-24T17:11:00.001+08:00

What is the defination of pride ?

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2012-01-24T17:10:00.001+08:00

Never mind, Im used to it.

It still hurts but i'll manage somehow.

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2012-01-24T17:06:00.001+08:00

It felt like I was treated like a ___ .

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2012-01-24T16:51:00.001+08:00

You wont ever know what im feeling right now...

Wont ever ~

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2012-01-24T16:44:00.001+08:00

Ye la aku nie kn mcm tk de perasaan gitu.

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2012-01-24T15:31:00.001+08:00

Boley mati aku :/

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happy birthday

2012-01-22T18:20:00.001+08:00

Ouh, damn its raining on a sunday.

Hmmmm, never mind at least someone is shining today. Shes wearing yellow today, and as bright as the sun so, she will light up and brighten the day, even though its dark, gloony and cloudy. Hope the rain stops soon . And ouh, urm, see the words below, do not press, especially my lil sis <3 ;D

~~DO NOT PRESS~~

Sorry, its one time only.

Im SHY ^^'

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2012-01-20T19:43:00.001+08:00

Hmmmmm,

Why does it hurt ?

What is it ? Its definitely not

Anger. Its more towards sorrow.

I guess its my random day today.

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2012-01-17T17:14:00.001+08:00

I dont know if youre mad at me ~

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2012-01-13T04:46:00.001+08:00

Sometimes i think back. The time when you made the decision to leave me for him.

I know its not wise to bring up the past but i cant help it but imagine. What if i didnt fight back. What if i agreed. What if i agreed and earased everything bout you. What if after that, i dont even wanna hear people mention your name. Not even your pictures which i cant bear to see . Even if you thought about me, i wouldnt even give a damn. What if you tried to reach me but i walked away. What if i were to have feelings of hatred sorrow, regret.

Sorry, i was curious and this came up. Hehehe.. And really, i couldnt imagine what would happen cause i really cant live my life without you.

Hahahaha

Syg bdk kecik nie <3 :P

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2012-01-07T07:45:00.001+08:00

Back then, while serving the national service. Lame picture

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2012-01-05T22:39:00.001+08:00

I know its my fault. I shouldnt have assumed that youre asleep. I wont lie that i forget about my phone ringing cause my attention was into something else. Its shows that im still childish like back then when i was still young. My mom told me that when ever i played games, video games or any other games, nothing can seperate me from it. Its like im glued to it. There was one incident where something was burning in the house, everyone was panicking but i sat there focusing on my game. On my game only.

But thats not the point, the point is i messed up. I made you wait, again. Pft !! Frustrated at myself. *sigh. I know something was amiss. I know what you feel but how do i put it ? Its like when ever youre down, my heart kinda ache. Why ? I cant explain it myself. Im still feeling it right now. Urgh !!

From the looks of it,

Im guessing you'd still give me the cold shoulder if i were to text you.

Argh !! I dont want any arguments between us. I dont want to have any bad aura to be felt. I dont know what to do...

I know youre mad at me and i know,

I'd expect you to have this thinking, why not i just forget everything, forget you. If i were to listen to my ego, i'd challenge what youve said cause i have this ' pantang ' to be challenged.

Hmmmmm, nvr mind.

I guess im just a bother to people ~

Ill be alone for today ~

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2012-01-05T08:46:00.001+08:00

Urgh. I did it again. Pft !!

I should go kill myself.

The cold shoulder.

Urgh, hate this feeling.

Nvr mind. I know you probably

Dont wanna talk to me or what so ever right now. I wont disturb ya.

Ill wait ~

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2012-01-02T19:52:00.001+08:00

Amino Acid (@BoboyAcid) has shared a tweet with you

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2011-12-30T02:09:00.003+08:00

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2011-12-30T02:09:00.001+08:00

Hais, i dont it like this.

Whenever youre like this,

It makes me down ~

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2011-12-27T18:26:00.001+08:00

I have a little body but an endless capacity. Thats why im used to things. ;D

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2011-12-27T18:10:00.001+08:00

I find it funny when people

Assume by looking and not

Knowing through understanding.

Humans, we are all the same.

I know i must move foward,

And not back. This is what

My mama always said. I understand

Im aging. Not gonna get younger.

I need to set my sights on my future.

I too need time ~

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2011-12-27T15:44:00.001+08:00

I'll lie in bed like im in the hospital

Except that np one is even visiting ~

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2011-12-27T13:23:00.003+08:00

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